Zombie Blood
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"If a zombie bites you, it's bad.
you bite a zombie, it's crazy delicious!"

                - Dr. Amad Cyontist
Every pouch of Zombie Blood is made with love and care

Learn About Zombie Blood

Q: Why don't I get infected by drinking Zombie Blood?

A: As any schoolchild knows after the zombie apocalypse of 2010, the zombie virus H1FU2 is transmitted through zombie saliva, not through the blood, as was previously thought. That means that only a zombie bite can infect you. As a safety precaution, we test each batch of zombie blood for the presence of H1FU2 and verify that every drop of green delight is totally virus free.

Q: Why does Zombie Blood give me energy?

A: Zombie Blood contains the extra strong green zombie blood cells that helped zombies to become the strongest, most horrifying scourge on the face of our planet. These cells temporarily give you zombie strength in the form of additional energy for sports, long workdays, late night studying, or ironically, killing zombies with a cricket bat.

Q: Why does Zombie Blood taste like lime?

A: Why does rattlesnake taste like chicken? We don’t know, it just does.

Thumbs Up to Blood!

Q: What’s the best way to drink Zombie Blood, warm, cold, 98.6F?

A: Drink it ice cold for best results. Zombie Blood is also good at room temperature. Zombie blood does not need to be refrigerated.

Q: How did you figure out that Zombie Blood gave humans energy and tastes great?

A: Credit for this discovery goes to Dr. Szasz and Dr. Rasmussen. Their work on creation of a zombie virus vaccine led to long hours at the lab working with zombie blood and salival venom. During an exceptionally late night and a double-dog dare by Dr. Szasz, Dr. Rasmussen drank a shot of zombie blood only to discover to his delight that it tasted remarkably like lime and gave him the energy he needed. After he convinced Dr. Szasz to stop screaming, “I can’t believe you actually did that!” and pointing one of the lab shotguns at his head, Dr. Rasmussen talked Dr. Szasz into trying a shot. The rest is history.

Please note: there is still no cure for zombification or the H1FU2 virus.

Q: How much caffeine is in a pouch of Zombie Blood?

A: 80 mg of caffeine are in each pouch of the delicious undead nectar. (About the same as a Red Bull)


These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.
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